What are the effects of ongoing stress?
Short-term stress can be beneficial, enhancing alertness and performance. In contrast, chronic stress significantly increases the likelihood of developing type 2 diabetes, hypertension, cardiovascular diseases, depression, anxiety, and other health issues. For men, persistent stress can also be linked to erectile dysfunction.
What occurs when we experience stress?
Both men and women typically respond to stress similarly at first: breathing becomes rapid, heart rates elevate, muscles tense, and sweating begins. In reaction to a stressful event or a perceived threat, the body emits a series of hormones that influence how stress is experienced.
How do men and women differ in their stress responses?
Men are more likely to respond with a “fight-or-flight” approach, while women often adopt “tend-and-befriend” or “treat and nurture” strategies. The fight-or-flight response is a primitive instinct that has developed for survival in dangerous situations, predominantly activating in men.
Faced with stress, women generally produce more oxytocin, known as the “cuddle hormone,” which helps to calm the nervous system and fosters social engagement. This response is enhanced by estrogen, the female reproductive hormone, promoting the desire for close contact and emotional expression.
On the other hand, men have lower levels of oxytocin and produce vasopressin, a hormone associated with aggression. Coupled with testosterone, which can create a sense of isolation, men may be more inclined to overlook their stress.
What common stressors do men face?
Both men and women share stressors like health concerns, the loss of a loved one, divorce, and significant personal illness or injury. However, certain stress triggers are more prevalent in men, as noted by John Oliffe, a professor and Canada Research Chair in Men’s Health Promotion at the University of British Columbia.
“Relationships can often be sources of stress,” Oliffe states. “For men, building partner relationships can be challenging, especially when they lack the tools to navigate them; many men learn about relationships through trial and error.”
“Financial issues are another significant source of stress,” Oliffe adds, citing data showing higher suicide rates among men following the 2008 global recession.
“Current pressures like recession and inflation, alongside stagnant wages for those with jobs, can exacerbate stress. Many men identify with a ‘breadwinner’ role, feeling pressure to excel in this area, regardless of their actual circumstances.”
What are societal expectations for men compared to women?
Society imposes distinct, albeit outdated, expectations on men and women regarding their stress responses. Men often feel that showing no emotion signifies strength. “Many guys think it’s taboo to express feelings,” Oliffe remarks. “They might believe they should be strong for others.”
Traditional expectations of “manning up” can hinder men’s ability to manage stress effectively.
The 3 I’s
Oliffe summarizes common stress responses with what he calls the “three I’s.”
1. Injury: Major life changes, like a breakup or job loss, where men often feel compelled to tough it out until it resolves.
2. Interiority: Men may turn inward to cope with stress rather than reaching out for support, sometimes resorting to substance use to numb their feelings.
3. Isolation: Social isolation is a significant predictor of male suicide. “If a man has an injury and chooses not to confront it, but instead isolates to hide it, it creates shame around not being able to solve problems or simply having issues. Such injuries may present themselves in unhealthy ways.”
What underlying issues might be present?
It’s essential to recognize that stress can signify deeper, underlying challenges. “Every man we speak with about depression mentions stress, and conversely, every man discussing stress points to depression,” Oliffe notes.
“The expression ‘I’m so stressed’ is less loaded, and it’s worthwhile to explore that statement further. Stress often signals other underlying issues. Mental health challenges may be present beneath the behaviors observed, which necessitates a deeper examination.”
What strategies can men employ to manage stress effectively?
Exercise
The mental health advantages of physical activity cannot be overstated. Regular exercise increases endorphin production, improving mood, focus, productivity, and sleep.
“Exercise is crucial,” says Oliffe. “It’s about setting small goals and creating routines that many men find appealing. It’s a chance to process thoughts. For example, I often go for a three-song run, and what matters most is the cooldown period, where I reflect on my day.”
Reach out
Connecting with friends, partners, or trustworthy individuals is another way to cope with stress. “Consider it mutual support: conversations with other men can validate your thoughts and feelings. There’s a sense of reciprocity. We thrive better with supportive company.”
Seek professional help
Accessing professional support can be beneficial in managing stress, and Oliffe notes that more men are seeking these services. Speaking to someone outside of one’s personal situation allows men to process their feelings and regain a sense of control.
The increase in online counseling since COVID has made it easier for men to seek help privately from their homes or workplaces.
Join a men’s group
Participating in men’s groups can be effective, as they promote accountability for introspective work, allow for witnessing shared experiences, and help extract wisdom from relatable situations. Oliffe suggests seeking groups that emphasize proactive responsibility rather than those that focus on unproductive complaints.
What about expressing emotions vocally?
While yelling is often seen as a male response, and expressing emotions is beneficial, this method may not always be constructive. “Yelling can indicate a loss of control and is frequently tied to overreactions,” Oliffe explains.
“Anger can surface as an expression of multiple unresolved emotions, leading to frustration expressed through yelling. This doesn’t resolve internal turmoil. It’s helpful for men to sit with their confusing emotions and question: ‘Where is my regret coming from? Where is my relief rooted?’ It’s fine to analyze these feelings, either alone or with professional support.”
Quick and easy stress relief techniques for men
Breathe deeply
Just a few deep breaths can lower blood pressure and heart rate.
Smell calming scents
Inhaling soothing fragrances or essential oils like lavender can help relax the mind.
Get tactile
Using a golf ball underfoot or squeezing a stress ball can provide relaxation and release tension.
Declutter
Excess clutter can heighten stress. Tidying your desk or workspace may reduce anxiety.
Laugh
Engaging in laughter—by watching something humorous or chatting with someone who makes you laugh—can enhance circulation and boost immunity.
Create a personal space
Spending a few quiet minutes alone in a comfortable environment can help soothe the mind.
Supplements that may help alleviate stress
B-complex vitamins
Research indicates that B vitamins can enhance mood, improve cognitive function, and reduce stress and fatigue.
L-theanine
This amino acid found in green tea helps elevate feel-good brain chemicals like serotonin and dopamine, thereby reducing anxiety and stress.
Lemon balm
A calming herb from the mint family, lemon balm aids in relaxation and sleep quality.
Magnesium
This essential mineral seems to promote relaxation and limit the release of stress hormones.
Ashwagandha
Known as an adaptogen, ashwagandha helps the body manage stress by reducing cortisol levels.
A painful realization
There is a connection between chronic pain and stress. While testosterone can decrease pain sensitivity, heightened stress levels may lower testosterone and elevate cortisol, worsening pain sensations. If chronic pain worsens, it may be beneficial to explore ways to mitigate stress.
